How Do You Carry On?

Life is a trial. No matter how wonderful it can be, it is a trial, and it is meant to be. There is no other way to grow. I can't say that I like it~I have a crazy notion that life could be wonderful every minute if every person would give 100% to loving each other, but that's neither here nor there. Life is amazing, but full of crazy, unfair, devastating bumps in the road. Sometimes those bumps are more like craters.

How do YOU get through those craters and over your bumps? What helps you to get to the other side? Really. I'm asking. I want ideas and resources. I will share them with everyone else so we can all get through this crazy ole life. Right now I need to share them with LaDena. She's in that phase of devastation where you have been through what should have been the hardest part of your trial, and then realize that in some ways the hardship is just starting. I've been there. Most of us have. When reality hits and loneliness is a bitter reminder of your loss. Finding joy is fleeting, even when you're looking for every scrap of it available. But finding it IS possible. It's even probable-especially knowing her. I'm making a list of ways to carry on, find joy, and keep going. Feel free to add to it. I'm open to joy. And I love you LaDena!

-I find a lot of joy on my knees, talking...although sometimes I get thinking too much when I'm on my knees....I do know that through Christ really is the way to be whole. Time is the issue. But I think after we look back at our grieving process once we've gone through loss, we wouldn't trade the process for anything.

-PEOPLE!! Sometimes you need a break from so many people loving you and "trying to help" but when I can, I need to have people around me to buoy me up and help me forget the loneliness. Even a card or text cheers me and helps me move forward.

-Music. I put caution with this one though. Music can lift me just about as fast as anything on earth. But I have to be careful it's the right song. If it's an emotional one, it can draw out the mourning 10 X longer than it would have been in the first place! Some of my favorites right now: Brighter Than the Sun by Colbie Callait, Life in One Day by Howard Jones ALWAYS makes me smile, Carry On by Fun, Brave by Sara Barielles, 22 by Taylor Swift, On Top of the World by Imagine Dragons, Firework by Katy Perry~anything that has a beat and boosts your spirit. Blast it. Dance.

-Food. Don't underestimate the power of it. It can bring togetherness on like nobody's business! Yes, be careful it's not all you do. But eat. Yummy things. That make you happy.

-Writing. Sorting my feelings is therapeutic. To a point. I don't draw it out too long or I'm exhausted.

-Reading. Nothing depressing though. Read all the pages of positive quotes there are on the internet. There are tens of thousand of them! I also recommend Saving CeeCee Honeycutt by Beth Hoffmann. It lifts the spirit and gives hope.

-Smell great smells that remind you of happy things. I realize this is a double edged sword because smells can attach us to events in our lives, but I wouldn't make it without them.

-Engage your funny bone. As often as possible. Store the laughter away!

-Count tender mercies. Every last one of them. Every day.

-Believe it will get better.

-And MOST IMPORTANTLY-only listen to the advice you want to!!!  xoxoxoxoxox