Judgment Day

I feel like I hear people talking a lot about judging lately. "Don't pass judgment on me~you don't know what I'm going through."  "If you don't agree with  *fill in the blank*  then you're judging."  "I can't be with those people because they judge me."  We throw these phrases around constantly. To judge means to pass sentence or critical judgment on something.  So I think we need to look at whether real judgments are being passed~or if, in fact an opinion is being expressed, a value is being upheld, or if we are just judging ourselves (and projecting our feelings into others behavior). Most of the time, no one is really being judged.

I may not agree with something a person chooses to do. This does not mean that I have judged them~ (handed out a sentence: "He is going to hell for  *fill in the blank* "), called anyone a name, or even said anything critical about them.  I just have an opinion, am adhering to a value I'm upholding, and am choosing a different way to see it. I think so many times we want to vindicate our behaviors that if we call foul on someone else for "judging", we think it somehow justifies our actions (good or bad). It puts the focus somewhere else.

 

The freedom to choose for ourselves is one of the most precious gifts we humans have. The responsibility that lies within what a person chooses to do with that gift lies solely on that person. Whether you think a person is "judging"  you or not is entirely beside the point.  If you make the choice, you'd better darn well be ready for the consequences that come with it. This applies to all choices~ good, bad, or ugly.

 

But if you are questioning your choices, or are wondering about making choices you aren't sure about, here's a novel idea. THINK. Then think again. Think about what you REALLY want, and what you want the end result to be-after the consequences have come. Think of what the consequences will be, and decide if you really want to face them. Think about who you want to be. Think about the people who love you. And think for just a minute...if someone actually does judge you, will you feel good about what you're being judged for? If you don't like the verdict, maybe you shouldn't be doing it. And if you need help, get help. I have learned this hard lesson many times myself. Remember who the real and final (and infinitely merciful) judge will be-and then use your gift of choice as wisely as you can. And be grateful you can choose.