There is a woman I have encountered off and on for the last 15 years. She is beautiful, has beautiful children, is poised, talented, and organized. She lives in an influential neighborhood and appears to have everything a person could want in a life.
Upon meeting this woman for the first time, I was pleased to have met her, and acted as such. The response I received was not quite as favorable. There was actually virtually no response from her. A slight, imperceptible nod of the head was the extent of it, and I had to really check myself to make sure even the nod was real.
I am a person who gives second chances. (And 3rd, and 4th.......) I usually don't trust my initial impressions because first impressions aren't always the most genuine representation of a person. I think first impressions are very situational, so I like to gain a feeling over a few interactions with a person, instead of just one. (I do, however hold high value in instinct, and follow it if prompted to do so.) At any rate, as I saw this person over the years, I went out of my way to be kind, acknowledge her, and be as cheerful as possible. The response was always the same.
I began to feel the she didn't like me, and I didn't understand why. To be fair, I take a lot upon myself that isn't mine to take on. I absorb blame like a sponge. I waved to her even when passing in my car. I said hi to her often. I saw her at religious functions and she either looked at me as if she were seeing me for the first time, or acted as if she had never seen me before in her life. It drove me crazy.
Eventually I had to come to a place where I just decided I didn't care whether she liked me or not. I had to realize that if she didn't like me, I had done everything in my power to change that. I had tried to be kind. I had done my part. And I let it go.
Tonight I went to a special event that one of the children from my school invited me to. There was a wonderful spirit there and I was absolutely reveling in it. As I sat there, this very woman came in and looked around the (full) room for a seat. There was one by me so I scooted my jacket over and motioned for her to sit down. She did and the event went on. When it came to a break where there was time to talk, I made a comment about the crowd to her. She smiled but said nothing. Not 2 minutes later she started chatting with me~about my life, my children, and my job. She had no idea that we lived by one another (therefore never realizing I had waved at her so many times.) She was so grateful for the job I do at my school and grateful for the things I remembered about her children who have been out of my school for a few years now. I began to think I had misread her. There was a wonderful spirit about her and I enjoyed my time with her. We talked throughout the rest of the evening and when we parted, we hugged and thanked each other for the time we spent together. I came home with a happy heart. I had been reminded that appearances are indeed deceiving. I was reminded that I don't know what is going on in any other person's life, or their minds and hearts for that matter. I was reminded that there is good in EVERYONE. I love getting those reminders. I love seeing good. And I am grateful!
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