Precious People

It seems I'm always telling others how wonderful people are and that one of the points of life is to develop relationships. I really do feel that way. My life is what it is because of the people who I have been blessed to have in it. My children have progressed because of the village of individuals who have been inspirations and guides to them. My job has evolved into what it is because of the mentors who saw potential in me and gave me chances to grow in education and child care. My marriage has grown from friendships that led me to my Chad, and we have blossomed in love for over 21 years now. Though we all come with inherent traits and personalities, the people who surround us shape us into who we can become.

That being said, social situations bring out the nervous person in me. It's only gotten worse as I've gotten older. I can work myself into a tizzy leading up to an event where I know I have to socialize. As important as friendships and relationships are to me, I guess I sometimes have a hard time believing that I could possibly be as important to someone else. I do not have a natural grace with people. I'm not witty and I am a terrible story teller. If I tell a joke, the punch line is always in the wrong place, or I forget the joke in the middle of it. I'm the person who thinks of something clever to say....3 days later. I'm a little awkward.

 







All of this makes me even more grateful for the people accept me, befriend me and even love me. I wouldn't make it without that kinship. I'm grateful when it is understood that I get nervous and am drawn in anyway. I love my peeps in all areas of my life. I'm so blessed.

 

This weekend was full of wonderful people moments, starting with an exhilarating, joyful reunion with 2 of my dear friends from highschool-Kimburly Smith Sa and LaDena Martineau Kailing.  We got together Friday afternoon and it was one of the most grand and fulfilling events I've had this summer. I'm amazed at the kinship that is still very present in our relationship and I'm grateful for the love that has lasted between friends over many years. I was so very humble that I felt loved and accepted and am even possibly important to these amazing women. I love them. They inspire me in the extreme. Now we just need our friend Charity to come be with us. Best. Day. Ever.

Me, LaDena and Kimmi





The rest of the weekend was just as inspiring to me as I was able to be surrounded by good people in my family, my neighborhood and church. I am in awe of the blessings I have in the people around me. Thanks to my peeps. I really do love you!

Me and Kimmi-friends for 28 years and counting

 

Craving Fall-But Not Wanting Summer to End-Yet

I start getting a little antsy this time of year. And hot. Although I do not like this about myself, I am one of those people who starts automatically counting things down in my head. I know that this habit depletes some of the joy I should be having in this life, because instead of being completely in the moment, my brain is counting down what I have left of that moment.

For example, whenever we are on a vacation, I start out enjoying the activities and having fun, but by the middle of the trip my brain starts yelling at me, "Oh no....we're halfway through! I only have X amount of days left of vacation!" And the countdown continues until it's over. I hate that! I try to drown that silly voice out but it's always in there dying to get out. As I've gotten older, I have tried to mercilessly squelch that voice as soon as it rears its ugly noise at me. I'm working on that.

I realize I do the same thing with summer break. I love my job. It's fulfilling, it makes me happy, I work with amazing adults and children, and it gives me something constructive to do during the hours that my family is gone. But I love summer. I love the freedom of it and the memories built during it. I admit that I am one of those moms that LOVES to be with her children. ALL the time. I love having time to spend with them. I love having a little more family time and that those evening hours don't have to be spent doing homework and chores, but outside roasting marshmallows and chasing dragonflies.

BUT. As soon as the middle of July rolls around, that voice starts up again. "You have to go back to work in 3 weeks." "Your summer is almost 3/4 over!" "The kids have grown up another year. You're running out of time with them."  It's relentless! I think that's why we try to cram in as many last minute activities as possible this time of year. We know we have to! And my goal is to enjoy every minute. I don't want to wish time away.

On a positive note for summer's end (no it is NOT here yet!!) I am craving Fall and all the joy that comes with it.  COOLER DAYS!!! Sweater weather. Hearty meals. Yummy spicy smells. Leaf piles to jump in. Halloween...and more life to live. I figure if that voice is going to be in my head anyway, I should give it a silver lining to shout about-right?

Cassie and Meghan leaf pile jumps-Fall 2004

Cute faces -2004

Yay for sweater weather!

 

Walmart Woes Turn into Wows

I'm a bargain shopper. I coupon -not the extreme way but enough to save about 30 bucks every shopping trip. I love sales and especially clearance sales. Though I look for the best deal everywhere, usually when I have to get the basics of grocery shopping done, I go to Walmart because that's where, as a whole, I get the best bang for my buck. That being said, I generally do not like Walmart.  It overwhelms me in the extreme. Between the drug deals I have personally seen go down in the parking lot, the police cars that screech up at least once a month while I'm shopping there, the scantily dressed customers, and the cussing I hear in the aisles, I get overloaded quickly. Add that to the volume of merchandise that is continually rearranged and the tired associates that work there, and I am a melt-down waiting to happen. I know-how can it be worth it, right?

Honestly, as bad as I've made it all sound, I am blessed (or cursed?) with being able to see the good in most everything. I get that characteristic in myself pointed out to me often. Some people think I just make excuses for the behavior of others. I prefer to call it seeing the goodness. I've said before that I pretty much love everyone-even if they act rotten. I still see the good things inside....the same is said of Walmart and the people there.

Yesterday was an exceptionally trying day at Walmart.  I was already tired. I walked into Walmart and they had rearranged the store-again (this time putting in a bunch of self check-outs.) Because of this, I couldn't find anything, and prices on just about everything I usually buy have gone up in a week's time (I'm sure to pay for the new registers!) I made it to the checkout lines-4 of them were open with about 10 people in each one. They all had very full carts. I'm looking around at all the tabloids-which are such a sad reflection on the world, and noticing everything around me. Crying babies. Yelling (and spanking) parents. Sassy kids. Grouchy checkers. A stressed out store manager shoving his way through everyone without a single "excuse me". I started feeling woeful. Overwhelmed. Sad, impatient, stressed out. I was ready to leave my full cart and just go home.

As I was looking at others, seeing that they all looked like I felt, I realized we were all feeding off each other, and making everything feel worse! I saw good people in a hard situation. Holy cow-WOW! Aha moment! At that moment (for that moment anyway) I pasted a big ole smile on my face. I let a lady with just a few items go ahead of me. I picked some things up for a mom whose child had dropped them all over the floor. She smiled back at me. She said, "That made my day, thanks!"  To the man who got called from another duty to come open a  register and ring me up, I told him how much I appreciated him taking the time to help. He said, "Thanks! I really needed that today!" No. I didn't change the world. Maybe I only changed me and my attitude. But I felt better. I made it through. I saw that we're all human, and tired, and we all have goodness in us. Sometimes we just need a reminder that it's there.

 

All Inspired and Revved up to Find Joy

(I started this at 11:50 pm on Sunday, July 14.)    Today was a great day. It was full of good people and great inspiration. It was filled with wonderful counsel and thought-provoking words. It was full of love. Love I felt towards ALL the amazing people in my life, love to me from my church leaders and coworkers in church, love from my family and from my Young Women. It was just good stuff all the way around.

I'm always amazed when a group of people though not together physically can become one in spirit and though not one person in the group has conversed with another about their thoughts, they still become one-and their thoughts take the same direction even though they were first thought independent of one another.  For example, a group of my friends were discussing health issues, and while being completely frustrated by them, we were also grateful for the blessings and joy we have encountered during them-even while suffering. We spoke about the lessons we've learned and how life is more important to LIVE because we do see joy in it-even through these ills.

Meanwhile for the last few months I have been searching for, finding, and blogging about finding joy-even the smallest bits, in the hardest of times- because it's there. And the bad times we have only enhance the goodness and joy because then we know how to grasp it and savor it, and it gets us through. I know so many good people who are facing tough things. I hurt for them and love them, and pray they get some joyful moments too.

Then today our wonderful Stake President Waddoups gave the most wonderful, meaningful talk  that included so many of the things that had already been on my mind. Oh, he said amazing things! I took notes. I was so inspired just listening to him today thinking, "These are all the things I've been talking about, writing about, and sharing. I'm so grateful I can gain a little more insight since it looks like this has all been on his mind too." He started with, "God EXPECTS us be joyful in this life."  And I'm thinking:I KNEW it!!!

President Waddoups' talk united me with those around me. It united me to him and his counsel. It made me understand life better, and why we go through the hardships we do. He said our hardships should not DEFINE us.... they should REFINE us. Make us better people, capable of more. Capable of empathy, and understanding,  and show us what has been done for us by God. We can get through if our foundation is firm in Him. What a great way to grow and help others grow with us. So I'm inspired in a BIG way. That's not to say that things won't get me down, because they will, but I hope I have the will to look for the good things that are everywhere despite my hardships.

PS-I found a great picture of Chad and me last night. He is one of my joys, so I'm sharing it!

Chad and I after Disney on Ice-another joyful event!

My Goal My Choice, All Year Through

I will always admit that I am a lover of Christmas! Yes- even though it is July 11, I am thinking about it, planning for it, saving for it, dreaming of it, and thinking happy, warm, sentimental thoughts about it!

But what I am really trying to do, is live it. The spirit of it, the joy of it, the love and generosity of it. I want to be that way all year long.

I know there are people who are strongly opinionated about Christmas and where it does-and does not belong (and that is ok). I'm a believer it belongs in our hearts. All the time. I think anyone who has felt the true spirit of Christmas will agree that it would be wonderful to carry that feeling always. Guess what? You can! I admit sometimes it's a reach, but it's possible. It is possible to feel joy and share joy every day. Even the bad days.

 

We just booked our 2nd Disney Cruise. It is 310 days away. I can hardly wait! We have a countdown going. Chad asked me today if I really loved our cruise as much as being in the parks. I gave an absolute "YES"!"  I find joy there as much as I find joy at Christmas. I get to live that spirit out in the Bahamas! In May!! But I also get to live it here at home whenever I look for that spirit and find it in the eyes of the 600 children at my school, or watching my neighbors care for each other, or observing the caring way that my children treat others, or when I feel the love of my husband when he looks at me. It's lovely, It's fun to look for. Look for memories. Look for joy! Live the spirit.

Christmas at Disneyland with Minnie 2004

 And P.S. I do love Christmas music all year-except during Halloween hee hee



My Delight

I. LOVE. MY. FAMILY! They delight me. I love them. I know I am blessed to have them.

Yes, Chad is conspicuously missing-he is taking the picture-but I love the picture of me and my girls!



I got to spend the day mostly with my Meghan today. We had so much fun. She is so witty. She can crack off the funniest things ever. People notice her sweetness. I know I am a very blessed mom. We tried a fun experiment  a couple of nights ago. Meg found a way to make "Merida" hair (from Disney's Brave) by setting your hair with straws. It was so fun! She looked amazing! She looked in the mirror, then ran to her room and in minutes had posted this to her Facebook.I couldn't stop laughing. She is delightful!


"Look. I'm Napoleon Dynamite!"-now her profile picture!

This was the process...

The end result before she washed it out  tonight. We had to brush it just to see what would happen!

And there's Cassie who works as a Nanny for two darling red-headed girls. She loves her job and comes home every night to tell us about all the sweet and tender moments (and not so easy moments too) that she has. She learns from these kids and is becoming a sweet little "mom". Again, I'm a blessed mom. People feel her sweet spirit.

And Cassie can be very fun too! (Cruella!)

 

Then there's Chad. I don't know how I got him. Actually I do. I was extremely blessed. I am extremely blessed. He understands me and my oh-so-quirky ways and loves me anyway. He is fun. We laugh a lot. We love a lot.

Arrrgh. My matey!

 

So I'm delighted. I'm blessed. I know it. I'm grateful. I'm so amazed that I get to come home to this haven of a home and this heaven of a family. Oh no. We are definitely not perfect. But we try...

Remembering to Remember

I had wanted to post something meaningful for Independence  Day yesterday. I feel that this patriotic day for the United States of America warrants a good post. But yesterday was so busy and we got to bed so late last night that I wasn't able to do the day justice through writing. So today I wanted to take the chance to remember....to remember what Independence Day is about.

A grand display of the American Flag at Utah State before their fireworks.
(I think this was taken by LaDena)

The first thing we did on our 4th of July was go to the North Ogden Cherry Days parade which is always on Independence Day. Cassie was on a Disney float so we wanted to watch her of course.  But the parade began with the scouts walking the flags down the middle of Washington Boulevard. What a beautiful and humbling sight. It was amazing to see people stand and silence their conversations and place their hands over their hearts in respect for our country. Of course there were the few that were too busy to bother, and it bothered me. I began to wonder if the 4th of July has become another day off work where we barbecue and play games or if it still holds significance -and we still treat it as the day it was meant to be. A day of humility, patriotism gratitude for the country we have been blessed to live in and one blessed by the grace of God. Well, I proclaim here that I have not forgotten, and I will not forget the blood sweat, tears, values, sacrifice and determination that went into building this great nation. God Bless America!

The Boy Scouts with our flag(s)

The American Legion
 

Purple Heart Veterans
 

 

 



Cassie as Cruella Deville and Stephen as Captain Hook-
of course I have to throw this one in!