FIGHT SONG

I was able to take part in a conversation with a couple of people, both of whom I dearly love, last night. It was a painful, yet healing conversation. Hard things were talked about, realizations were made, trials were dissected. I sat for most of this conversation and listened to the itemization of hardship, loss, and suffering my family has been experiencing for the past several months. As an onlooker it sounded quite grim. It was actually hard to hear bit for bit what our challenges have been and what we are facing at this time.

Amy Marie and me at dad's funeral

The amazing thing was that the longer I sat there, the stronger I felt. With each tick of the box that was made in the things that were against us, I felt a heightened need to fight. For each strike mentioned, I thought, "Yeah, I made it through that!" or "And we're still alive." or "We are going to fight through this and win!" I came out of our conversation feeling good. I came out feeling strong. I came out feeling able. My faith is heightened, my outlook is good.

I'm not saying the road from here will be easy, or that having an evening of aha moments and strength is going to make my world suddenly come into balance. I'm just saying that this specific conversation didn't show me how horrible things are, it showed me how much I have dealt with and survived it...so my track record shows I can keep doing it. It was a blessing I hadn't gone looking for, but was given to me in such a timely manner.

I am not a person that enjoys a good fight. I avoid one at all costs-at least most of the time. But the fight I will fight is the fight against giving up. I will rail against depression. I will stand up to falling down. I'm standing a bit taller today. I didn't make it this far to quit. I will rely on the tender mercies of Heaven, the people that I love, and the miracle of being alive, and I will FIGHT. For me, for you, for all who are facing things-and everyone is. So I will fight. Carry on.