No Fair

Life is truly not fair. It's not. The cards we are dealt are not always pretty, not always fun, not what we hoped. Life is good, but not fair for sure.

Two things I try to remember are-a) life has unfairness for every  human being, and b) sometimes the unfairness comes from our own choices and the consequences of them.

The situations of unfairness that seem to weigh on me the most are the ones where people are unfair to each other. There will always be illness, death, natural disasters, and other trials that test the faith of humans. But suffering from someone else's unkindness is something I wish we humans could just move past and learn from instead of perpetuating further unkindness. Sometimes I think it's not even being necessarily unkind, but being completely thoughtless. It is human nature to be a little selfish-overcoming the "natural man" means just that-overcoming the selfishness inside us and caring about the bigger picture. In all fairness, I think some of the naturally occurring bleakness that comes to us arrives because it helps us to forget our selfishness and help others along. But how sad that it takes these instances to be kind.

This week I have felt left out, overlooked, and unappreciated in certain aspects of my life. These are things that every one of us experiences and hopefully we are able to move forward after wallowing for just a minute. The interesting part of this is that for every little prick to my soul, there was someone there to fill in the holes and raise me back up. There were beautiful things given to me through both the written and spoken word in times where I needed it most. I am so grateful for those people in my life who follow the inspiration to help me along at just the right time.

What happens to me whenever I am feeling that life is unfair is that after I have waded through self-doubt and a little self-pity, I ask myself what it is that I need to learn from these situations. Invariably I come to understand that my job in the matter at hand is to turn and lift someone else. When it comes down to it, I want to be a builder. I want to make a difference. I want to bring a good light and a bright side to anything another might be dealing with. This is what we are here for. I am amazed I always come back to this answer because I am known for feeling small and I wonder how just one person can make a difference in something that seems so big, so unfair to another. But then I think that it only takes one person who comes along and makes a difference to me in my big, unfair situations, and I know that at least, that's a start. Carry on.

The Essentials

Hear me out. I swore I would never do this. When essential oils came into "popularity" I didn't want to be a part of it-especially with the big name brands that cost so very much. I was not about to jump on that bandwagon. But I am a believer.

My stash of essential oils-or at least the stash

my husband knows about...

I am a believer that we humans have truly everything we need on this earth. Many maladies can be remedied or helped from the things of the earth. Much of it has been discovered and much of it has yet to be discovered. Remedies come in the forms modern medicine, alternative therapies, nutrition, minerals, vitamins, and so many more things that don't even occur to us to think about. I believe that God has inspired great minds to research and develop drugs that will help mankind overcome disease and injury. He has also inspired ordinary, everyday men and women to just try something to see if it works, and many times it does! My family has explored every avenue in the remedy cabinet for things from anxiety to cold relief to pain relief. We have used over the counter medications, prescription medications, natural supplements, massage therapy, aromatherapy, and many more.

And the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations.

Revelations 22:2

 

So when Chad's company quite literally pushed an alternative medicine plan on us, and I was able to try a specific brand of oils at a fraction of the cost, I went for it. Now, we have always used aroma therapy in our home. Lavender is one of our staples for sleep and calming. Eucalyptus, camphor and peppermint have always aided us in our many respiratory afflictions. So I began devouring information about oils, mixing them, the best ways to use them and incorporate them into our lives. ***I do not believe there is one answer or cure all for anything or any one. But I do believe that the combination of modern medicine and natural practices can make our lives easier.***

So I am a self proclaimed chemist-in the art of oils anyway. I am a nerd. I am teased for it. But I am good at it. I can't absorb enough information on the way these things of the earth can work together for good. I have read entire resource books in a matter of days and mixed oils for my friends and family. These oils have aided headaches, colds, asthma, cramps, anxiety, insomnia and more. I have found a friend in them and learned to rely on them in many situations. The best part is that I have not experienced a side effect yet!

Then our insurance company dropped the alternative medicine portion of our plan and I was lost. And I cannot (will not) afford that one brand, even though I loved it when I used it. I think highly of those oils and anyone who offers them, but I had to find something easier on my checkbook.

I am not one to tout other companies very often, especially on my blog. But after a little anxiety and much research I have found a wonderful company that produces quality products for good prices with many sales. Though I am not going to specifically name them, I will specifically link them from here so that if you wish to give the oil world a try, there will be an easy route from here. I recommend them and enjoy their products regularly. So there you have it, my one blog about the essentials!

http://www.pipingrock.com/?rwcode=AABFPH

Cry Baby Cry

Last week as Meghan and I were driving home from South Ogden, we came upon a wreck. The rescue vehicles were arriving at the scene, traffic was slowing down, and people were starting to gawk and try to get a better look. Me? I burst into tears. It had already been a long, but good day.

A day of shopping and heart to hearts.

We had spent the day with Cassie and had a great time, but we had also had some melt downs and heart to hearts. More of that in a moment. The fact stands that whether I had already had a full day or not, I would have cried. I am always grateful that I wear sunglasses because I cry at wrecks, and many, many other emotional times for other people. Not because I know the people or know what happened, but because I feel FOR the people, and HOW they must be feeling right then. Scared, hurt, bewildered...I run the gamut and feel each feeling for the other human beings involved. I am told this is empathy. I have loads of it, and this is supposed to be a good quality. Sometimes I hate having so much of it.

I have always worried about things, but I mostly worry about other people. I worry about the things others are going through, and how they must feel facing these things. When my father-in-law had his heart surgery, I couldn't sleep. I felt anxiety and fear for him. I felt HIS worry. When a person loses a loved one, I feel the emptiness that comes with loss. When a person cries, I always end up crying too. This has been something I have been made fun of for, but I seriously cannot help it. The crying is automatic. You can be someone I have never seen in my life, crying on TV and I will cry right along with you. I hurt for you and with you. When it comes from someone I know and love, it gets ridiculous how much I can feel. The day of the wreck, I had been consoling Cassie over her change in jobs that was coming immediately. I know God has great plans for her and has lined up wonderful things for her future, just as He always has, but in that moment, the loss of her latest job was heart-wrenching and a little bit of a blow to her self-esteem. She loves so much the family that she has been working for, and to see past that love to something new was almost more than she could take that day. SO we all cried-a lot. Then I came home and worried and cried some more. And slept less. And worried through her last day of work. Then cried some more with her after she bravely said goodbye.

My two girls.

And so I may always cry....Empathy. The world doesn't have enough of it. Sympathy-sometimes yes, empathy most of the time, no.

Sympathy means feelings or impulses of compassion.

Empathy means the psychological identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.

When it comes right down to it, I think empathy is a gift. Sometimes it is hard to bear, but when I really need to share it with someone who needs it, I am glad I am able to. Understanding what someone is feeling because you can feel it too is a blessing, and sometimes a curse, but I know it is one of the gifts I need to give, and do it willingly. Can you imagine how different our world would be if we could feel pain for others? It wouldn't take long for us to understand each other better, would it? Find your empathy, use it freely, let it become your super power if you will. It's a game changer.