ALL CAPS

It has been a weird summer. It would have been weird anyway. My kids are grown up and working. I am off for the summer so summer only means anything to me. And I spend most of it alone. So I guess it really doesn't mean anything to me, either. I have a Santa Claus sized list of things I need to get done around here...things I don't accomplish during the school year-but it has stayed pretty much the same size this year. Losing my sister threw me off track at the get go. I have stayed off track-I guess in reality I have just changed tracks and am on another instead. Not the one I planned on, but a good one nonetheless. My new track consists of  helping others accomplish their lists, trying to cope with my loss and help the ones I love with their loss as well,  or trying to rest off the extreme fatigue I have accumulated this summer. I am not doing great in any area-but I love trying. I'm a little Looney, but I'm trying.

A little Looney

Between feeling like my summer is almost gone ( I start back to work in less than a month) and losing my sister, my need to grasp any and every  opportunity to LIVE is exceptionally persistent right now. I have always had a fear of (well, when it comes right down to it-EVERYTHING, but...) missing out on things-experiences. Feeling like time is rushing past me and understanding that a life can be cut short at any given second has made me almost frantic to go live. I was talking with my family one day about the need to blog, and that I felt it needed to be about living life fully. I wrote a note to myself that said "LIVE LIFE" so I would remember to blog about it. We all caught on that I had written it in all caps because I felt it was so important and we came up with my new mantra "LIVE LIFE IN ALL CAPS".  YES!!!!  I LOVE those "lightbulb" moments.  I feel this one deeply. It is my Bio statement on Facebook. It is my goal. It is on my life list. I no longer have a bucket list----- because the things I want to do, I want to do while I am living life fully-not check them off before I die.

This need I have nipping at my heels has had me filling my calendar with experiences for the coming days-and anyone who knows me knows I relish an EMPTY calendar. But living requires time and events and experiences. We have filled the coming months with FanX (and meeting some of our favorite stars), a lantern festival, a Twenty One Pilots concert, plans to go to travel to places we have never been before, organ recitals on Temple Square, and many more items that will help us grasp everything in life a mortal can grasp onto. I want more. Not more stuff. More things to take with me. Memories. Feelings. Love. I want to experience everything I can (within reason) while being mortal.

Which has made me think that living life in all caps also means freeing ones self of unnecessary problems and burdens. We worry about so much already. Life brings truckloads of problems all on it's own and we humans tend to pile even more trivial worries and issues on ourselves-adding to the pressure and taking away from the joys we can be experiencing. Pettiness.  Jealousy. Gee, that jealousy is an ugly one. There is absolutely no point to it. It's the devil's tool for certain. Jealousy does nothing for anyone except stir up negative emotions. There is no purpose to it. And no need for it. (Do ya think I have some strong feelings on that one, maybe????) Then there's judgment and gossip. Being unforgiving. Expecting too much and giving too little. Seeming unfairness. Entitlement. Gosh. Let it go. Holy cow! The things we cling to that make us miserable when we have the ability to make a choice and give up the burden. Those things can add so much more weight to our burdens. Forgiving someone helps YOU-the other person isn't even affected (I guess unless you go to them and tell them they are forgiven`and half the time they don't know they did something that needs forgiving... WE are the ones who have clung to it) -you get the relief of letting it go. Doing your part gives you joy and a sense of accomplishment you can't get from just taking without the work.  LIVE. LIVE WELL. Give yourself a good life by going all in. In ALL CAPS. Get through the junk, and then live the rest at full throttle. Look for good. It's everywhere.  Stop looking for differences. Look for the things that bring us together. Look for what our Maker sees in us. Talents. Gifts. Potential-so much of it untapped!!  Love. Strengths. Myriads of good. Realize we've all got them. GO LIVE!!! Go now! Don't waste any more time. LET GO OF THE STUFF YOU DON'T NEED. I am starting the movement. I'm starting with myself. And I'm grateful.