Zen and Now

I'm feeling pretty Zen right now-which is amazing because the last week has been an absolute whirlwind and I am so far behind I don't know if I will ever catch up! But all the ingredients that bring me to a peaceful state are in action right now, and I am so, so grateful for that.

I love it that every person has different things that give them peace. We have always teased my sweet mom Shary about her vacuuming. It gives her such a Zen feeling! I don't think there has ever been a time that I was at my mom's when she didn't have the vacuum out at least once during my visit.

But I admit I get where she is coming from. Cleaning is one of my Zen providers. I think it must be the fact that something always gets accomplished when you clean and almost 100% of the time you can see immediate results. You know I have too much on my mind if I am madly scrubbing away at something. But I always achieve clarity. And Chad calls me Junior Shary when he sees me with the vacuum. What a great compliment-on more than one level.

Another thing that brings me solace is my job. I love it. I accomplish great things through small acts all day long. Now don't misunderstand that I am promoting myself or trying to make myself bigger. I am a very average "Joe" that for the most part accomplishes very average things. And I am okay with that. But I LOVE the fact that I can make a child's day better every single day, multiple times, with multiple children, just by loving them. And I am good at loving. I'm grateful I am able to do just that every day. And I get it all back, with interest. Work is also a place I am able to be creative, and though my creative abilities are being taxed right now, I am still loving the challenge and satisfaction I am gaining by using that side of my brain.

The thing that brings me the most Zen right now is my family. I LOVE THEM! They are peace, my joy, my reason for living. Providing love and a stable environment in this crazy world is one of my sweetest pleasures. I am so blessed to be able to have married my Soul mate. We have fun and passion, and deep understanding. We laugh, we cry, we compare notes on everything from the latest joke to the deepest issues. We are madly in love. I still melt when Chad calls me  his girl. I am blessed to have been sent some of the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful, understanding, old souls for my children. They delight me, and knowing I have been entrusted with them makes me happy. I am grateful I know God and that He has allowed me to be a wife and mother along with all the other titles I am privileged to carry.

FAMILY- MY OHANA

I know that peace can be fleeting, but that there are things that bring a lingering sense of tranquility when everything else seems to be wrong. I am grateful I can always have that underlying peace if I stop and remember what I truly have.

Because I'm Happy!!

I know, I know. Usually at this time of year I am feeling a little melancholy and wishing that time could slow down. Summer is winding down and I started work this week. But guess what? I'm happy!! I am actually ready for change. I am ready for work. I am ready for routine, and I am ready to be with people I have missed all summer.

Summer Travels

It's funny because this summer has not gone anything like I expected it to. I realize much of life is this way, but in the beginning of June I actually envisioned (don't laugh now) glorious days of almost 3 months being divided between relaxation, family time, lots of sunshine (I am exceedingly white this year) and a multitude of projects being ticked off my to do list. I know-I'm too optimistic sometimes. But life comes at you fast and I have a half finished guest room, a patio with only half of my summer furniture on it, my carpets mostly shampooed, a few activities crossed off, and a very white body in my shorts.

But I am happy. My chores will be there tomorrow, no one needs my guest room, we've still enjoyed time outside, I crossed some things off my bucket list, and I was born quite white (and will always be that way so tanning now wouldn't have changed much in the long run.) I cemented family bonds, saw family I haven't seen in years, celebrated my parents' 50th wedding  anniversary, reenacted my first date with Chad, and celebrated the lives of two amazing ladies. I still had fun. I definitely found joy.

Bucket List Item: The Drive in Movie! First Time Ever With the Family!!

Now I get to move forward. I'm kind of excited about it. Change makes me a little nervous. But as much as I worry about time passing too quickly and the craziness that a new school year brings, I also appreciate the way it gives a fresh start to things. New friends, new ideas, new skills, new experiences. It's like the new, coveted box of 120 crayons...it's scary to make that first mar on the crayon by setting it to paper, but as you imagine just what that box of crayons contains, the excitement takes the front seat and off you go to see what is next. That is the fun part. The promise of something more, and that it could possibly be even better than what you already know. I am excited, and I am grateful.

Acceptance Speech

These days I am constantly analyzing the world and everything happening in it. I take in all the information coming at me and try to make sense of it; and that in itself is hard because I do not trust so much of the information that is out there. I think almost every bit of information we intake is skewed in some manner. The media is so much hype anymore...and I think it gets humans hyped up on what someone thinks we need to get hyped up about. Problem is, I can't seem to figure out just who that someone is that decides what gets hyped. Where is our information really coming from?

One thing I do see is that we get hyper about causes. We make anything and everything a cause. The media throws out words like "victim" and "discrimination" so much that these words don't even hold meaning anymore. If everyone is a victim, then no one is a victim anymore, because everyone can't be one in the same situation. But bandwagons are fun to jump onto and the fear of being in the wrong camp plagues a lot of humans. So there are many who jump on for the ride of inclusion, and not so much because the cause is something they really believe in.

I have noticed that this phenomenon has made it much easier for people to justify almost anything they wish. And finding others who "accept" the behaviors and beliefs that we see as the cause of the moment seems to lend a bigger push towards things that we might not have originally agreed with before the cause became popular. Acceptance eggs on the justification process, when really the acceptance of others has nothing to do with the reason we should be doing something. In the end, we answer to ourselves and justification will not save us if we have chosen the wrong path. Acceptance from others does not make something right. Popular opinion does not change fact. Saying something is red when the color is really blue does not change the color.

Now I am not here to make judgments or pretend I know what is best, or even make analogies of any situation out there, but I think that it is really, really important to weigh the things that we have an inclination to stand behind, and make sure it is for the right reasons. Reasons that we can truly live with. It is also crucial to know the facts behind the cause, not the hype. This also takes soul searching. As a person with sometimes extreme amounts of empathy, I have to stop myself and understand what is real in a situation, and not what has been hyped and glorified. It's a full time job, but one I have to look to my conscience and value system to achieve.

In my heart, I know what is right, and my heart may know something different from yours. As always, I'm grateful for agency, and that everyone has that gift of choice. The rest is up to us.